The Islets of Langerhans lie in the cold waters of the Pentland Firth North of Thurso. People, though they travel not to that dreary place have remarked at how the Isles take the formation of the face of Tariq Ali. I do not see it myself. But the haunted cave of Langerhans would be a cold sore on Tariq Ali's bottom lip with this idea in mind.
The cave, a vast unexplored wound in the midst of a barren forest is located on the West reaches of the Isle of Plenti. To reach the cave, I hired the services of an ex member of A.R.S.E: Sandy Showtime, a keen mariner and boatman. I knew in advance that no local beyond Caithness would dare set sail for the evil Islets of Langerhans.
The Isles themselves are shrouded in fear and dismay. The only real charting of them was carried out by Graham Horne Spawnsmyth IV between the Summers of 1803 and 1804. With his companion, naturist and angler Fuzz Nightbrine, Spawnsmyth observed the local wildlife, mapped the ragged Isles and documented the strange Geological formations to be seen including, but not only; The Giant's Graveyard, Ulman's Causeway and Timbar's Bollocks.
Near the end of their studies, nay, the very night before their return trip to the mainland, Spawnsmyth and Nightbrine full of mirth and the water of life, dared to enter the Cave of Langerhans.
What followed is known to no one. For Spawnsmyth IV was lost in the dark, murky passages, and though Fuzz Nightbrine escaped to their vessel The Curious Wink, he spoke never of their trip, and soon after every hair on his body turned chrome. He was admitted to the Scottish Sanitorium 'St. Lucious Fibre's' where he rocked himself to sleep every night, before escaping into the surrounding woods and buggering himself to death with tree bark.
This story I recounted in detail to Sandy Showtime as the Islets of Langerhans drew into view under the foggy mists and haze from the Firth waters in the twilight.
RB.
