Although I'm touched by the level of interest honed by the death of middle aged jazz funk gargler Mary Curtains, I'm more concerned about the escape of my dog into the pale night.
In such a bizarre situation when you own a dog possessed by a rogue demon (is there any other kind, like, do you get 'confused' demon, 'academic' demon..'sexual' demon?) who do you call first? The local animal welfare group or the local animal spiritualist healer?
Frankly, I settled for the Rev (His Gracious) Ignatious Jones (PHD from the Distance Learning University of Invergordon). I called him after nine and he's on his way now. I've heard that Jones is a tempera(mental) genius who'll either find your animal and cure its possession, or go into a trance, cover it in mystic Aztec healing oil and bum it til sundown.
There are rumours that he exploits his qualifications (sic) to practice extreme bestial tendencies, but to be honest, I simply have to take the risk. I'll watch him like a woodpecker.
Must dash, the cow raping genius is here.
RB.
Awww, I thought your going to be talkin bout the bitch wit the massive fanny. No fair.